Dear Vi,

We have ta casual family-owned and -operated business in a small city, and recently, we hired a family friend as chef. He moved several states to work with us. The problem is he's completely unhappy with our menu. We have served this classical Mexican menu for 3 generations, and figured if it's not broke, then why fix it? The bigger problem is that our chef yells at our waiters and waitresses. How can we handle this situation?

N. Mex.

N. Mex.,

Normally, I'd say, fire him. But, because he's a family friend, and, obviously, this means a lot to you, things are complicated. Use the menu problem as the jumping ground for a discussion on what will make him happy... that is, your finding him a job at a fancier restaurant. Surely if your family has been operating for 3 generations, you ought to be able to pull some strings.

Regarding the screamer part: people who scream at others for any reason are insecure and need help. Have a card of a local therapist on hand for your discussion. Remember this is a business decision and not an emotional one.