Anyone who has more than one child knows that the process for entering and exiting one's getting kids in and out of the house/car can be as complex as international travel:
Preparing to Travel
- Have we packed extra clothes?
- If the visit is near naptime, do we have pajamas?
- Have we packed toys to distract them (for long restaurant meals, grocery store trips, etc.)?
- Do we need snacks/treats?
- Has everyone gone to the potty?
Going Through Security
- Is anyone carrying an object (like an extendable lightsaber) that could be used as a weapon against the pilot or copilot?
- Is anyone concealing something (used stickers, artwork, toys, jewelry, parents' possessions, etc.) in his/her pockets, shirt or jacket to smuggle it on board? If so, commence patting down children...
- Have the children been checked for appropriate attire (one of them—guess which-—likes to accessorize)?
Now Boarding
- Are all passengers seated and buckled?
- Are car seats and booster seats in an upright position?
- Are windows and doors locked?
Return Trip/Kauffman Customs
- Is anyone concealing something (insects, allergy-provoking vegetation, small animals, garbage, etc.) in his/her pockets, shirt or jacket to smuggle it back home? If so, commence patting down children...
- Have the children gone through a 10-day quarantine period to ensure they have not brought communicable illnesses into the domicile? (Okay, so that one was just wishful thinking.)
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