Communications Overreactions
Maybe it's the pressure of this time of the year - end of semester, a shortened work month, the rush for Holiday preparation - or maybe it's that everyone is running full speed all the time, but there certainly have been a lot of angry notes and email recently. Some days working through my inbox it seems like I've been dropped into a den of hungry dogs, after having a gallon of beef gravy poured over me. I bet you feel the same.
Email is a lousy communications tool. It lacks any sense of emotion so of course we project our own on to it and never stop to consider we might just be wrong. There are always two filters at work. One is the author's and one is the reader's, and often they are not synch'd.
The next time you're upset by something you received, or something you heard in a meeting, rather than react quickly, why not talk to the other person, and ask in a neutral fashion for more understanding. It can go a long way toward reducing conflict and building better relations.
Email is a lousy communications tool. It lacks any sense of emotion so of course we project our own on to it and never stop to consider we might just be wrong. There are always two filters at work. One is the author's and one is the reader's, and often they are not synch'd.
The next time you're upset by something you received, or something you heard in a meeting, rather than react quickly, why not talk to the other person, and ask in a neutral fashion for more understanding. It can go a long way toward reducing conflict and building better relations.
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Those seem like fight'n words to me, partner.
Those seem like fight'n words to me, partner.
Don't have anything to add, only the point to underscore. Seeing the same phenomena and at least for me, in every case recently - it was the orthogonal filter "trick" at work. Take a deep breath, pick up the phone or grab a cup of coffee with a colleague.
I completely agree. I'm sure that we've all seen emails that sound completely rude, and then when you see the person they have a different tone.
I posted a blog entry a while back that was touching on this sort of topic - people having the wrong assumptions, assuming the worst, and letting their emotions drive their dialogs.
I agree - and in my role - I know all too well how true this is. While I think e-mail can be used effectively in the right context, it is indeed the worlds lousiest communications tool. The irony is that we've grown accustomed in some circles to communicating this way, without ever considering the human factor. While I'm usually pretty good about responding in a timely fashion, I've also learned to redefine exactly what timely means in certain contexts. Some e-mails can be answered right away and others cannot/should not be answered until one has had a relatively good night's sleep and some time to think. I do find that walking away to take a quick break and then picking up the phone after some time to think does wonders.