I've Identified from Both Sides Now

*But now old friends are acting strange They shake their heads, they say I’ve changed Well something’s lost, but something’s gained In living every day *

Joni Mitchell came to mind as I sat to compose this, my final piece on identity. I feel as if I have looked at identity from both sides now- from how I see myself and how I am seen by others. Identity is important because it is what (to use an analogy to wild horses) defines our place in the herd.

Who defines this identity? At first, several weeks ago, I believed that I was in charge of my identity, how the world saw me. Each individual takes the collected experiences and finds meaning from participation, and WE construct who WE are. Identity is not a tangible that can be objectified. It is “the constant work of negotiating the self”. [My favorite line] “It is in this cascading interplay of participation and reification that our experience of life becomes one of identity, and indeed of human existence and consciousness. However, of late , I have come to realize that each person sees me in a different light, depending upon the social interactions or lack of same that have occurred. Brandon sums it up this way, “My identity is who I am – or is it simply who I perceive myself to be? It is who I am to others – or is it simply who others perceive me to be? To this I reply, “Yes!”

The idea is so simple, yet Scott really blew me away when he pointed out that I have an identity even though I had nothing to do with building it, and, in fact, people from far away whom I do not even suspect of knowing me, view me through my blog, or by hearsay, and have an image of who I am.

John agrees, “Wenger’s discussion on identity talks about how we’re all the sum of our parts— we have many different identities, depending on where we are, who we’re with, what we’ve experienced, etc. What if there’s a big part of your identity that you’re not even aware of? Does it still contribute? Who gets to decide one’s identity? “

Steve negated the multiple identities arguement about there being only one identity. “I don’t think that people have multiple identity, whether that be an online identity, a spousal identity, a mother/father identity, a work identity, etc. Instead I believe as Wenger does that an individual has one identity and is a member of multiple communities. Granted showing some parts of an identity are more appropriate in some communities than others but what forms an identity is multiple community memberships and changes and identity and membership. I can see how it would be easy to be a periphery member of many communities and a central member in a few. It would also be easy to be transitioning in and out of multiple communities at the same time and throughout a lifetime.”

I had thought that real life identity building was easier and more clear to determine one’s place in the herd, but as Brandon clearly points out, in another entry, “Interesting how two different communities see me as an expert in the opposite world, yet not in their own. My actions are important, but my identity is dependent upon the context of the observer. Perhaps my identity is not that I am an expert in camping or an expert in youth development and literature, but that I am an expert in bridging these two communities?”

Synthesizing the discussion on identity, this is what I know. Identity does not reside in the person. Identity is the meaning people make about a person from the person’s engagement and participation in a community.(more about that in my next post). People can bridge communities, can broker connections between communities, can show parts of themselves to one group and other parts to another group, and the identity shifts and changes with each social interaction.

I have marveled at the identity shifts in myself over the last 15 weeks. I seemed an internet interloper, far removed from the social aspects of Web 2.0. My identity was old school e-mailer. My confidence was low, but the acceptance into the new community quickly defined my identity and from the outside looking into myself, I appeared to be engaging in the accepted and expected behaviors of the community. It was only when I heard Cole talk about me in the ETS talks, that I realized how my identity had changed. As the community defined me, I began to define myself. From both sides now I am a Web 2.0’er. I would like to say that my life is forever altered, but I know that with each passing minute and human interaction, it continues to be altered… identity flows and ebbs…much like the clouds on a windy day. Who am I ? Wait and see.

Ive looked at clouds from both sides now From up and down, and still somehow Its cloud illusions I recall I really don’ t know clouds at all