The Wendorfian Times
Volume IV : Issue 2
Christmas 2008 Plans Being Laid:
As is well known, the Tribe is secretly planning to spend next Christmas in Boerne Texas to celebrate both the 50th wedding anniversary of Tribal Retirees located there and the 2008th anniversary of the birth of one Jesus of Nazareth. So far, proposals for activities include the following:
1. Eating Tribal Grandma’s food.
2. Making a fire and roasting marshmallows.
3. Playing board games and card games.
4. Watching Sarah play Phase 10 while sitting next to Art.
5. Playing either Laser Tag or Paint Ball as a Tribe.
6. Showing off “The Barn” to those Tribal Members who have not yet seen it’s vast…um…awesomeness.
7. Taking pictures.
If you would like to make suggestions about the plans for this upcoming event, please email Tribal Christmas 2008 Coordinator Richard at rgwendorf@hotmail.com.
World Cup Announcement
Attention soccer fans! FIFA has announced that the 2014 World Cup will be played in BRAZIL! This is important to the Tribe because Tribal Brazilian Wagner happens to be a closet soccer fan! Now here is a question for you. Who in their right mind thought that it would be a good idea to announce this 7 YEARS in advance? Good night, we’ll be lucky if the country is still in one piece by the time 2014 rolls around! Anyway, congratulations to Brazil and good luck to the USA, Germany and Argentina!
Tribal Member Achievements
This final section of the Tribal News is dedicated to the recognition of recognizable achievements achieved by recognized Tribal Members since the last issue of the Wendorfian Times was published. However, since very few Tribal Members sent in things that we could mention, you will notice that most of the items listed are exclusively drawn from first hand contact with specific Tribal Members :
Tribal Two-Year-Old William: William has learned how sing his ABCs, how to count to 10, his colors , how to clean up his toys and other messes, how to pray , how to go peepee in the potty , how to build with Legos and other blocks, and how to use zippers and buttons.
Tribal Dude Michael: Michael has learned how to use the signs for food and ‘all done’, how to sing along with different kinds of songs, how to pick up toys , how to speed read , how to kick a ball , how to growl , and how to go under and around such things as legs and chairs.
Tribal Surfer Jenny: Jennifer won an online story contest , created the Wendorfian Times Website, created a website for an up-and-coming artist friend , beautifully decorated her home, and put up with three Wendorfian Males!
Tribal Zombie Arthur ‘the Younger’: Arthur has been accepted to present a research paper at an academic conference being held at BYU in March 2008, is currently applying to Doctoral Programs located in Illinois, Texas, Pennsylvania and Georgia, and has recently passed the oral defense of his comprehensive exams for his Masters Degree.
Tribal Warhammerer August: August has officially announced that he is joining the BLUE TEAM! August has also been working very hard on his Warhammer figurines, and has even had a magazine request a picture of one of his figures! Since we could not get a copy of the picture due to copyright, the image that you see here is just an artist’s rendition.
2. Making a fire and roasting marshmallows.
3. Playing board games and card games.
4. Watching Sarah play Phase 10 while sitting next to Art.
5. Playing either Laser Tag or Paint Ball as a Tribe.
6. Showing off “The Barn” to those Tribal Members who have not yet seen it’s vast…um…awesomeness.
7. Taking pictures.
If you would like to make suggestions about the plans for this upcoming event, please email Tribal Christmas 2008 Coordinator Richard at rgwendorf@hotmail.com.
World Cup Announcement
Attention soccer fans! FIFA has announced that the 2014 World Cup will be played in BRAZIL! This is important to the Tribe because Tribal Brazilian Wagner happens to be a closet soccer fan! Now here is a question for you. Who in their right mind thought that it would be a good idea to announce this 7 YEARS in advance? Good night, we’ll be lucky if the country is still in one piece by the time 2014 rolls around! Anyway, congratulations to Brazil and good luck to the USA, Germany and Argentina!
Tribal Member Achievements
This final section of the Tribal News is dedicated to the recognition of recognizable achievements achieved by recognized Tribal Members since the last issue of the Wendorfian Times was published. However, since very few Tribal Members sent in things that we could mention, you will notice that most of the items listed are exclusively drawn from first hand contact with specific Tribal Members :
Tribal Two-Year-Old William: William has learned how sing his ABCs, how to count to 10, his colors , how to clean up his toys and other messes, how to pray , how to go peepee in the potty , how to build with Legos and other blocks, and how to use zippers and buttons.
Tribal Dude Michael: Michael has learned how to use the signs for food and ‘all done’, how to sing along with different kinds of songs, how to pick up toys , how to speed read , how to kick a ball , how to growl , and how to go under and around such things as legs and chairs.
Tribal Surfer Jenny: Jennifer won an online story contest , created the Wendorfian Times Website, created a website for an up-and-coming artist friend , beautifully decorated her home, and put up with three Wendorfian Males!
Tribal Zombie Arthur ‘the Younger’: Arthur has been accepted to present a research paper at an academic conference being held at BYU in March 2008, is currently applying to Doctoral Programs located in Illinois, Texas, Pennsylvania and Georgia, and has recently passed the oral defense of his comprehensive exams for his Masters Degree.
Tribal Warhammerer August: August has officially announced that he is joining the BLUE TEAM! August has also been working very hard on his Warhammer figurines, and has even had a magazine request a picture of one of his figures! Since we could not get a copy of the picture due to copyright, the image that you see here is just an artist’s rendition.
Official Gingerbread House Contest Rules Announced
1. Judging will be by blind vote.
2. The trophy maker gets to pick the three categories.
3. The coveted position of trophy maker will rotate each year.
4. The creation must be 100% edible.
5. The creation must be an abode.
6. The creation must have gingerbread in it.
7. Pictures of the gingerbread house entries should be emailed to the Tribal Trophy Maker at: bprwendorf@sbcglobal.net.
8. No more than 20 pictures of each entry should be submitted.
9. Pictures need to be submitted to the Tribal Trophy Maker BEFORE 8:00 pm Texas Standard Time on December the 15th.
10. Tribal Members will be allowed to vote for one winner for each of the three categories.
11. Votes must submitted via email to the Tribal Trophy Maker before December 20th.
12. Winners will be announced and trophies will be sent out on December 20th.
“Remember it isn't how much work you put into it, it's how freaked out you make the rest of us when we see your unhinged insane, off the meds, concept come to life.”
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The Wendorfian Times Joins the World Wide Web:
As you may have noticed , the Wendorfian Times has moved onto the web! The decision was made based on two reasons:
1. This way we wouldn’t have to deal with whinny Tribal Members whose computers can’t read Word files.
2. By doing this we can increase our profits by at least 200%!
Special thanks go to Tribal Webmistress Jennifer for creating and maintaining the webpage!
Tribal Members and Friends of the Tribe are now invited to not only contribute items to the Wendorfian Times itself, but to contribute items to the webpage as well. If you have any questions, comments, donations, or suggestions for the webpage, please contact the Tribal Webmistress directly at: bubble8012000@gmail.com.
2. By doing this we can increase our profits by at least 200%!
The Yellow Team Flaunts its Stuff on YouTube:
After many excruciating years of prolonged waiting, a public copy of the legendary Tribal Search for the Wendorfian Grail has finally been released! This short film has it all! Yellow lovers, Monty Python quotes, shi…poop on faces, and an amazing action packed set of special effects that will all keep you laughing on the edge of your seat! Congratulations to the Tribal Acting League for creating this masterpiece and to the Tribal Editor for getting it online on YouTube and to the webmistress for putting it on our website!
Please feel free to rate and comment on this video, by going to: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmO2JWGaZwA and to tell us how the %#@?!* we can make it so that you can search ‘Wendorf’ on YouTube and have this actually pull up as a search result.
