Distance Makes The Heart Grow Fonder


| 7 Comments
We've all heard the saying distance makes the heart grow fonder. Since we're all in college and most of us are far away from our home, I'm sure many of you have experienced what that saying truly means in more ways than one. Whether it be your parents, your siblings, your best friend since you were five, or more specifically your boyfriend or girlfriend, going away to college and saying goodbye to those people definitely puts a strain on that relationship right? Logically we would say of course those miles apart from the people we love makes the relationship tougher, but recent studies go against what you would normally think.
According to a CNN article researchers conducted a study of 63 relationships that were in long-distance and not long-distance. They compared the amount they spoke to each other, whether it be texting, phone call, Skype or whatever other crazy way you can communicate with technology these days. When looking at the frequency, people in long-distane relationships communicated with each other more than people who lived close by. Not only that, but the long-distance participants said they "forged stronger bonds" and "felt more intimate." You can read more here for more details on the study.
At first it seems hard to believe that distance in a relationship would actually help rather than hinder the quality of the relationship, but the more you think about it the more sense it seems to make. It goes along with the saying you don't know what you have until it's gone. We learn to appreciate how great our relationship is when we don't get to see our significant other as often as we would like. 
Despite the logical reasoning behind the study's results, there are some things that make this study more difficult to believe. For starters, couples reported themselves how they felt about their relationship. With researchers taking their data, they could have felt pressure to respond a certain way, creating bias. Also, the sample size consists of only 63 couples. In the large scheme of life, there are obviously many more couples than that in the world. With the small sample size, it doesn't do the best job of capturing couples of all different ages, backgrounds, and sexual preference. Whether you want to believe the study or not, it is a little comforting knowing that maybe distance isn't that bad after all. 

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Photo courtesy of http://gigaom.com



7 Comments

I agree with this article in that distance makes the heart grow stronger. I myself am in a long-distance relationship, so I can attest to this. Although it is hard at times, it makes us stronger. The times that we do see each other are that much better and we feel a stronger connection. When you don't see each other every day, you have to find different ways to connect with each other, like skype calls, care packages, or just calling each other in between classes. There has to be a significant amount of trust involved as well, which is what makes the relationship stronger. On the other hand, you never get sick of each other!! Here is a funny and cute article from buzzfeed on the perks of being in a long-distance relationship! http://www.buzzfeed.com/jeremybender/reasons-why-long-distance-relationships-are-better-than-y

I am an only child, so before I came to college the attention was on me 24/7. This was good and bad for many reasons.I didn't get away with much and if something happened or went wrong at home it was most likely my fault. With that being said, I couldn't wait to get out of the house and get away! I am currently a sophomore at Penn State and over the past year and a half I can honestly say that distance has created a stronger bond between my parents and I. I have matured a lot while being on my own and am closer with my parents than ever before. I find myself missing home frequently and calling my parents often just to check in. Especially because I am an only child, I do get homesick often. I think the distance between my parents and I while at school has definitely made our relationship grow stronger. In the article, Long Distance Relationships: Does Absence Make the Heart Grow Fonder?, it focuses on long distance relationships like a spouse. Although different in form, it is still similar to a parent and child relationship. The longer you spend time apart, you miss them more which only shows how much you love them.

When was reading what you said about it being a small sample size it also made me wonder what age group they used. But, although it doesn't seem like the most reliable study it seems to make sense. People now are so sexual with each other so fast now days they're almost forced to stay away from that aspect of the relationship and just communicate with each other since that's all they can do. This way they would learn way more about each other. Also, I've basically been living with my boyfriend and when you're with somebody everyday you don't have as much to share with each other to talk about because you do so much together they already know anything you'd have to tell them.

I can easily relate to this because I am currently in a long distance relationship. I was with my boyfriend in highschool for two years and then we went to college. I have noticed our relationship has been significantly better since we went to college. Distance does, in fact, make the heart grow fonder. We now communicate about every little thing. I would like to do more research as to why the partners feel more intimate when having long distance relationships.
In this article:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/18/long-distance-relationship-benefits_n_3616839.html

I have found that the reason why intimacy is so much greater is because the couple is sharing all of their thoughts and feelings at that exact moment because communication is better.

I found this post extremely interesting. The only worry I have about this study is the sample size. I wonder how they decided who was going to participate in this study and why they thought they would be a good fit. I definitely agree with the hypothesis though. Whether it be a bond with a partner, a friend or a family member I truly believe that being away from them makes you appreciate them more. I know from personal experience that being at college has given me a greater appreciation for my family. I get more homesick now than I did when I was a freshman and look forward to spending time with them. I really enjoyed reading this article from the Huffington Post about things you'll miss when you're in college. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/cassidy-hopkins/5-things-youll-miss-about_b_2411654.html
Each of these things are true for me, and I'm sure they are for everyone else as well! I think it would be interesting to research more studies done like this to see the results! Thank you for sharing I thought this was really interesting!

I can easily see how "distance makes the heart grow fonder" because when we are not physically around the people we love we tend to remember all of the good times and cancel out all of the bad making us appreciate them more. In some situations distance is not a good thing. For example I know many couples or even friends stop communicating because of the distance between them. I really do believe distance shows peoples true colors in whether or not you want to continue the relationship with whoever it may be by keeping in touch constantly or losing it all together.

Why is it that we miss people who are farther away? Personally, I miss my best friend who is six hours away from me just as much as my best friend who is one hour away. Although the closer friend is easier to see, I still only get to see her when I am home, so essentially the amount of distance doesn't matter. I agree that you definitely strengthen bonds with people when you are away from them because you appreciate them for who they are when they're not constantly around you. However, if you still don't have the ability to see your friends no matter how far away, does the distance really affect the amount that you miss them?
It was hard to research this topic because I was mostly presented with quotes about missing someone, though I was able to find some information. I found an article that basically presented the same study that you mentioned, though to me it still doesn't make sense. While I understand what they are saying, I definitely agree with you that the study needs to be done across a wider subject pool.
http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/07/20/long-distance-relationships-2013/2568295/

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